Tag: self

“It’s not about money, but sending a message.” — Joker, The Dark Knight

“Poverty entails fear, and stress, and sometimes depression; it means a thousand petty humiliations and hardships. Climbing out of poverty by your own efforts, that is indeed something on which to pride yourself, but poverty itself is romanticised only by fools.”  — J.K. Rowling

My summer trip to NYC,  London, and Edinburgh cost me US$ 2500 in total. It includes $900 for transportation, $400-500 for accommodation, and $1000 for food, souvenirs, tickets, and others. And my spending has also increased in the last year. It includes an increase in rent, food expenses and six TKD testing. As a result, I not only don’t have any saving during the past year, but also had a big money problem during the summer. It was fortunate that I got extra TA sessions in the summer to cover some costs.

It’s funny that you won’t realize its importance until you don’t have it. But then again, being a graduate student means choosing to be poor. And there is a difference between being poor and choosing to be poor.

Cut back unnecessary expenses.

Rains in fall are mainly caused by the cold air moving from north to south to replace the warm air. And this replacement will not only result in rains, but also a change in the humidity, atmospheric pressure and of course temperature. All of these  change in the environment will affect body functions. Since the body needs to adjust to the change, it will use a part of its energy for this adjustment and will not perform as efficient as it usually does. And naturally, the efficiency of one’s daily activities will go down, in work and other ordinary routines. My observation tells me that this low activity period due to weather change happens to everyone. And for me, it also causes stress because I like to keep a high level of activities. Being self-aware about this chain of effects help me cope with similar situations. But every now and then, when I just got lost in the middle of all the things I was doing, it’s hard to remind myself to slow down and not to stretch to the breaking point.

I just watched the movie The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Just as different music gives different mood,  different movies have different moods as well. This movie gives me a new perspective. There are different ways of living a life: running is one; walking is also one. When you run, you enjoy the speed. When you walk, you enjoy the scenery. Slowing down the daily activities doesn’t mean accomplish less, but rather it is just a different way of living, if the eyes and the mind are kept open.

TKD black stripe. Black belt test next July.

I submitted my first ever paper in early April to Advanced Materials. Writing it is a tedious journey. It took four months. I found it is very helpful to have the first draft ready as early as possible so that you know what is missing in the paper, and then you have a direction in planning experiments. Also, Whitesides’ advice on writing an outline first is an effective approach for organizing the data. Organizing references is challanging as well. The help of Endnote is indispensable through out the process. I hope after this first one, my next paper would be less time-consuming. (Nah, it never is.)

Failing in the GH residence adviser is a negative feedback.  Probably it means that I am not fit for this position, in terms of skill set and personality, so instead of trying hard to fit myself into what I may not excel, I should look elsewhere and keep my energy focused on things that I am really interested and good at. It also makes me think about why I do what I do. I ask myself this question about the When Pigs Fly workshop.

It turns out that I like people different from me, and enjoy exchanging ideas and engaging in vigorous and yet civilized debate. So I love what I do in WPF. Besides, there is a need in a community like graduate house for people with diverse cultural and professional backgrounds to connect and exchange, in a meaningful way and in depth. So besides being my passion, it also feeds the needs of such a community and would be a contribution to the local community, which is the essence of WPF.

After the first interview, my application for graduate house residence advisor, international student, came to an end. And somehow, I feel my mind is cooled, and whenever that happens, I know it is the best time to write something because there won’t be any trace of ego exerting, conscious or unconscious. The inner self is humbled.

I was watching the Champion Leagure Final this afternoon, and to my disappointment, Man. United lost the match. They lost it because of their arrogance, which reminds me the quote of Bob Noyce “Success breeds complacency. Complacency breeds failure. Only the paranoid survives.”

I wouldn’t go as far as seeking failures from time to time in order to gain a moment of tranquility, but it seems to me that failing something every now and then is a necessary component to balance the mind, which often stays too excited with its own product.

To keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.
– Gautama Buddha,’The Enlightened One’

It has been eight months since my last self-assessment. Over the last eight months, I have experienced steady improvement in my physical conditions, which is mainly attributed to regular exercises and a healthy diet. Tae Kwon Do has become an indispensable part of my life, and I am impressed by the pace of my own progress: I am a blue belt now. I have explored the effect of several more herbs and incorporated several new foods into my diet.

Through the exercises and my daily self-observation, I am more and more convinced that the strength of the mind relies heavily on the strength of the body. I cannot think clearly nor fully when I am tired or when my body does not function properly. Besides thinking, fatigue and any malfunction of the body also affect the emotional stability. Anger and impatience, cynicism and pessimism can kick in if I am not watchful enough. To guard against those negative emotions and thoughts, proper rest and self-awareness are vital. In a word, the brain cannot work without a working body.